The ‘you-know’ virus, expanded version

Posted: October 17, 2010 in Uncategorized

(NOTE: The virulent verbal virus known as the ‘you know’ affliction was posted two months ago.

Since that time more have been added to the list. In this expanded version the five top non-afflicted with the virus has been added.

Another addition to the expanded list are the top five who have a serious case of this verbal disorder)

The verbal virus of saying “you know” has afflicted Hollywood stars like Kevin Spacey and Dustin Hoffman; the irritating “you know” has infected the movie mogul Quentin Tarantino. Tennis luminaries like Roger Federer and Andy Murray have succumbed to the verbal virus.

Deepak Chopra, the prodigious writer, philosopher and sage is infected with the scourge.

As is Barbara Walters, the legendary and mega-TVstar. In a September 2010 interview on the Larry King Show, Barbara spouted the virus every third or fourth sentence, showing that even professionally-trained super-stars and mega-stars are infected.

Smitten with the virulent verbal virus is another mega-star, Jay Leno.

Michael Phelps, the Olympian swimmer, has a serious case of you know-itis. Every second sentence the virus erupts. Phelps affliction is SEVERE.

Another person with the serious infection is Chris Collingsworth, the NFL football commentator

Non-celebs and non-sports people are plagued by the “you know” syndrome. Watch any interview on CNN or BBC. The interviewee will invariably spout the virus.

Kevin Spacey, the star of American Beauty, night club entertainer and master impressionist. was the guest on August 7, 2010 on CNN’s “Talk Asia.” Here’s an example of the exchange with the CNN hostess. Kevin, “I love imitating Bill Clinton, you know. When he was President he told me his throat hurt and he could not speak, you know. He asked me to do the speech for him. (Kevin did a remarkable two-sentence impression of Clinton.) “The President told me to forget it, as I was better than him, you know.”

Roger Federer after his loss in the 2010 Wimby quarterfinals. “My back was hurting, you know.” “I was also playing with a leg injury, you know.” “You know, I can beat the big hitters when I’m 100% fit.”

Andy Murray, when interviewed any time, any place, any where: “You know, my play is erratic at times.” “I’m looking forward to the US Open later this month, you know.”

George Clooney, actor, is infected. He appeared on Larry King on October 15 2010.

Terrell Owens, the star receiver for the Cincinnati Bengals, is unable to put together two sentences where “you know” is absent.

Anderson Cooper, the master commentator, has the verbal virus. Watch his impromptu comments on his CNN show. When reading from prepared text he does not spout “you know.”

A mild case of the virulent virus is found in Jimmy Wales, the founder of Wikipedia.

1st place: Kevin Spacey, actor
2nd place: Michael Phelps, Olympian swimmer
3rd place: Barbara Walters, mega TV star
4th place: Roger Federer, tennis player
5th place: Andy Murray, tennis player
5th place tie: Jon Stewart, the super star comic and host of The Daily Show has a bad case of the virus, as evidenced from his appearance on The Larry King Show seen in Bangkok on Oct 21 2010
5th place are the plague-infected Hollywood screenwriters, directors and producers
Also tied for 5th place are an avalanche of TV writers, commentators, weather reporters, directors and producers.

For some unknown reason, the Hollywood directors and producers and the TV producers and directors continue to avoid telling people to get healed from the virulent verbal virus.

1st place Oprah
Tied for 1st place Mr. Bean
2nd place Larry King
3rd place Steven Sackur (host BBC TV series Hard Talk)
4th place Wolf Blitzer, CNN host “The Situation Room”
5th place Tim Sebastian, BBC analyst

Redmond O’Hanlon, aka ‘the Spaghetti Trafficker,’ pointed out in two of his newsletters that the ‘you know’ virus irritates him. The former Spaghetti Trafficker is waiting for a serum injection that will result in a global healing of the runaway epidemic.


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